I was laying in bed in the middle of the day (a very unusual place for me to be spending time as a non-napper), watching the light change on my wall and I remember having an overwhelming feeling of dread with an undertone of excitement filling my chest. 

Is this my life? 

How did I get here? 

Why can’t I finish anything I start? 

Why does all of my creativity seem to disappear as soon as I set off on a new project?

 Am I even worthy of calling myself an artist? 

These questions came at me with lightning speed- doubts, worries, fears, but at the same time another thought made itself known: prioritize yourself! 

Why had I let life get in the way of my passions and desires? What was stopping me from going after everything I wanted and more? Why was I more concerned with what other people needed from me then what I needed from myself? And as I laid in bed thinking about all this I began to google (and I’m being totally serious here) “How to date yourself”. BAM, this was the missing piece! 

I desired to be in a deep and meaningful relationship with myself, and didn’t know to choose it before that moment. The moment I was able to admit I felt stuck and hopeless was the moment I had the realization that I had the agency to decide who it was I wanted to be in the world. It wasn’t up to anyone else to ensure that the life I was living was up to my expectations and desires, this was my work, and my work alone! 

Excitedly I bounced out of bed and started to dig deeper into the feelings. If I wasn’t having the experience of life I wanted, what could I do to change that? Mapping out actionable steps, plans, things to try, and ways to focus on myself became my full time project. I tried different ways to cultivate my joy, call in pleasure, court myself- everything I would normally do for a lover- all for ME.

Choosing to date myself and cultivate a loving relationship with my own life has informed the way I move through the world. 

As I write this a year after closing on my first home without any financial help (!!!), working a job I created for myself, having full agency over my time and schedule,  and a full creative calendar already planned for 2022, I am overjoyed at my life. 

This loving, committed relationship with myself has opened the door to an incredible partnership, a magical practice, and connection to my ancestors. 

Although I couldn’t have predicted the way this journey would go, making the decision to prioritize my pleasure, and my life was the best thing I could have done for myself. 

Choosing yourself is a huge step! 

I want to see you thrive with the support and love of a community. I am here to help you identify the life you want to live, and transform your self-care into a love affair through Your Pleasure Filled Year. 

This program will provide the guidance and support you’ll need to come home to yourself and to your best life. I am so excited to share this intimate space with you, babe, and to see you grow into the amazing person that you are! If you are feeling ready to step outside your comfort zone and into a pleasure-filled life, fill out the application here. Applications close today, January 15th!